During my high school years I passed up just about the entire summer. I was not going to be seen in shorts, skirts, dresses or a bathing suit. I played sports in high school and hated every minute of it, not because of the sport but because of the shorts. Track and Volleyball had such short shorts and that was literally all I could think about while on the court or on the track. As a young woman you associate cellulite with being fat and feeling fat can lead to depression or even eating disorders. I suppose I was lucky enough to have never had an eating disorder, but I did and still do suffer from what I claim as minor depression or anxiety over the littlest things.
Now, lets fast forward to early stages of marriage. This is where the insecurities came out in full force. Nothing will make a woman feel more insecure about her looks than knowing what a great guy she has, but not knowing how ‘forever’ it would be. My husband would tell me over and over how much he loved me the way I was and how he supported me in any decision I made, but the problem was still present. It wasn’t until I was pregnant that I gained any motivation to change my ways. During my pregnancy I gained 40 pounds and weighed in at 201 lbs. the day of delivery with a baby weighing a tiny 6 lbs. 7 oz. It wasn’t until delivery that I knew I had my work cut out for me.
After my son, Layton was born it was time for some major goal setting and keeping the motivation going! My goals were small, achievable and each goal had a date attached to it. My biggest goal was to be back in my pre-pregnancy clothing in 9 months or less. There are several women who do this in a much shorter amount of time, but it took me 9 months to gain my 40 lbs., so I gave myself 9 months to lose it. I am very happy to say I lost my 40 lbs. in 7 months! After my 1st goal, each goal became more ‘fine-tuned’ so to speak. Each week I would set goals and some would be as small as run 1 mile a day, while others may be eat clean 95% of the time. Other goals were to limit alcohol from my diet. Each goal helped me reach my current physical state.
After losing my initial 40 pounds I was tightly in a size 11/12 jean and weighing in at 160 pounds. Motherhood isn’t an easy job and my body didn’t bounce back into place without a fight. Being a new mom in a town with no friends and family was hard enough, but being all those things and trying to make time for myself, my fitness and learn how to eat for the body I wanted was not an easy task at hand. I had good days, bad days and really awful days. With each new day I encountered I also became stronger, not only physically but mentally as well. You see I wasn’t born with the genetics of a fitness model or any model. I knew the body I wanted was going to be hard work, but I didn’t know it would be that hard.
5 months postpartum I became overly sensitive to just about anything or anyone with an opinion other than mine. I cried all day and I would cry at night while my husband was asleep. It wasn’t until one night that I woke my husband up and asked him to just sit there and listen to me, to not speak, to not judge and to not laugh at me. I began to tell him how I was thinking about self-harm and how I understand why people do such things. I could see the fear in his eyes as they began wandering around on my body. I quickly told him that I didn’t hurt myself, but was afraid of what may happen if I didn’t get help soon. My husband was amazing through the whole process and even asked if I wanted him to call the doctor for me, but I wanted to reach out for help on my own to prove that I was strong enough to want better for myself, my husband and my son. The following morning I called my OBGYN and began a prescription for antidepressants. In the beginning I felt like a failure because I needed help, but soon after I realized how strong of a woman I was for reaching out for help. It takes courage to not feel like you are a failure when asking for help. Postpartum was my biggest setback, but also my biggest achievement. Dealing with postpartum set my standards high because I knew if I could get past this I could get past anything.
Three months after reaching out for help I was going strong! My workouts had increased and my nutrition was becoming easier. At this time I decided I was ready for a bigger challenge and ready to accomplish some real goals. I contacted my great friend and mentor CJ Woodruff about a custom meal plan and custom workout plan. Once I received my plans I joined a gym for the very first time at the age of Twenty-Four. I had no idea what I was doing in there, but knew if I wanted it bad enough I needed to start my research.
Every day that week I went into the gym with my plan in hand and cell phone in the other. I had to Googled every move because I was new to weightlifting and the gym. It was funny now thinking back how I had to watch videos over and over to make sure I was doing things correct. I will never forget the feeling of walking into the gym to sign up for the very first time. It was like going to school on the first day, a sense of excitement and nervousness. Once I found my groove in the weight room it wasn’t long after that CJ gave me a shout and asked if I would like to attend his school, PFTA (Personal Trainer School).
The thought of going ‘back to school’ after 8 years was a bit intimidating and took a lot of thought. I discussed the opportunity with my husband and of course he was supportive of my decision. Becoming a personal trainer and sports nutritionist was never on my list of things to be when I grew up, Ha-Ha. It had actually never crossed my mind, not even while losing weight, but once the idea was put in front of me that’s all I could think about. I thought about it every day until I started class in 2011. December 2011 I was handed two certifications, CSN & CPT. I was beyond blessed and thankful for CJ and all that he did for me. Having these two certifications now allowed me to help other women who were struggling as I did. I could now offer education and motivation!
As I sit here today in 2013 I look back at all I have accomplished and have done with no college degree or classes on business. I worked my way from high school, to working full time, marriage, being a mom, battling my weight to gaining my certifications to now running and operating a business helping women and men lose weight and stay motivated. As the years move past me I would like to achieve notoriety in just about any fitness magazine and would love to one day be able to travel and speak to others about weight loss and what they can do to help get on track and stay there.
My job here isn’t complete — it’s just the beginning.